walking down memory lane. it’s one of these expressions that paint dream-like scenery, don’t you think?
a serpentine highway you walk along as not always blue skies weight over you, these in-loop moments colours-coded with Instagram-like filters. the colours of sunflowers for the happiest, for those not seen in technicolour sin city, AND– AND SUNLIGHT-STARS ALLOW US TO TRAVEL SAFELY SO WE DON’T GET LOST IN HOLLOW AND SKIES RAIN WHEN FEELING BLUE OR GETS CLOUD– oh, wait. I got carried away again*. 😅 might be because my brain is wired to see magic, like seeing thousands of coloured dots** and thinking they are fireflies. ❤
* you witnessed a plot bunny getting out of its burrow, squid. I have to write a 320-pages book with skies that feel blue sometimes, travellers that try to get into hollow, and of someone that read in sunlight-stars now!
** I have the sight of a bat which might trigger this phenomenon, but–but. you ruin this poetic interlude, ok!?
I’m confused now. loading process. oh, right! I didn’t know what I should write for this post. something witty? something magical? a review, perhaps? of which book then? my ghost left its shell to eat apricot-peach ice cream at the scary thought to pick what book. I was left then staring at the skies lit with fireworks on memory lane. with a list of to-do.
thank you, ghost! the skies changed three times, I almost misread twice the sunlight-stars, when the golem that lets plot bunnies get out of their burrows growls from its tiny house*: of which books have we fallen in love first? of, f r e a k i n g, course! books have embedded spells within them, different spells, so we have many first! 😱
* note: it’s what is written on his mailbox, but it has nothing of a tiny house but the blue curtains. /whisper/ i went to a tea party there.
I walked down memory lane to feel again these little bugs unfolding in my chest. it triggered happy, magic feeling. like this first feeling you had while reading how the enchanted ceiling in Hogwarts mimicry the sky outside. 😍
I stitched together #MANYFIRST books that behold this first-time spell because I already have a soft spot for you, kraken.
FIRST ‘ I WILL GO DOWN WITH THIS SHIP ’ OR THE FIRST TIME I SAID ‘ I WILL GO DOWN WITH THIS SHIP ’ ( AND MY SHIP SANK TRAGICALLY LIKE THE TITANIC )
it’s now 17 feet underwater. in a sea filled with my tears, in a field built with wires and flowers. ❤ never my ships can’t sail away into the sunset happily ever after, that’s my curse. death picks someone to play with / have epic tea parties or tragic events happen or everything all at once. the clouds i can handle, but i can’t fight an eclipse*. /cricket sound/ I ship jake and bella from new moon, yeah.
* if with this hint you have guessed, you’re my new favourite human being!
the cosmos sent warning though, but signs are easily misread ok. like sunlight-stars*! but he whistled as they hiked in the forest and when she was with him, he felt like the sun and uurgh! freaking heart eyes. 😍 what if she had chosen jake!? powerfull. epic. 😭
* you should have read the magic interlude!
FIRST ‘ I CRIED MY HEART OUT, HOW DO I PUT IT BACK NOW? ’ OR WHEN I GOT MY HEART BROKEN FOR THE FIRST TIME
there should be an instruction book on how to put a heart back in its place. it’s tricky, messy and complicated. I’m a cyborg, ok? my heart is plugged-in, I feel quietly. when something breaks, I crack open my chest and fix it with tape. nobody needs to know I have blue flowers growing between my ribs*.
but the fault in our stars by john green was my freaking grenade.
* you know now I’m blue inside, but let’s keep it secret.
I wanted to stay in a fairytale world where we always have rose-coloured glasses on. instead, my candy world blew up and every happy thought I ever had shattered. it watered so much the flowers! it was so awkward to have my heart out of my chest as I clumsily try to repair the water damage. 🙈 luckily, tears may not be great for steel and wires, but they do wonders for the human skin. at least, we have this*.
* coupon on staples, tape and crazy-colours threads for stitches, too.
FIRST ‘ I BELONG TO THIS WORLD ’ OR THE FIRST TIME YOU FELT LIKE YOU WERE AT HOME
I’d liked to say that i grew up with this book, carried it with me everywhere like i used to with my teddy bear. well, not a teddy bear, teddy bear. I had a cute dalmatian puppy with no spot. ( up to this day, she still travels with me ) but I knew how to read and was taller than three apples the first time I read harry potter and the sorcerer’s stone*.
* not all harry potter. i missed 2 283 pages or so. 🙈
if I never had the chance to be little+very sad that they didn’t send me my Hogwarts letter, I have been lucky enough to be sixteen and have somewhere to feel like home aaand very sad that they didn’t send me my Hogwarts letter. 😭 ( I think the owl you sent to give me my letter surely get lost. still waiting! ) but it’s so easy to feel like home at Hogwarts whether you still carry your teddy bear or have your driver licence or all-in-one. ❤
I know what all of you are thinking. “ at Hogwarts? you feel at home at Hogwarts!? 😨 ” it’s easier to feel at home in a fucked up world where they harvest you to fight to death of course. being killed by genetically modified bees always been my personal favourite. what a peaceful way to go. but I have more affinity with magic than murder*, though. I always wanted to learn how to levitate a feather.
* that’s not what my internet history says.
aesthetical as shell 😍
FIRST ‘ THIS SHOULD BE WRITE IN GOLD WIRES. RUMPELSTILTSKIN! ’ OR THE FIRST TIME YOU THOUGHT IT WAS THE ONE
‘ that’s the one. my favourite one. ’ you say as your eyes fill with galaxies while you stare in awe, speechless at the last page. that’s just a wild thought bookworms have once in a while really. we are, biologically, not designed to choose between books. or anything for that matter.
but when you close your last very good book through some chemical imbalance it literally sings with your bones. never you are going to read something this wonderful. WRONG! bookworms biology 101! this wild thought will pop up 0.3 seconds after you stay ‘ 😮 ’ at the next last one. 0.3 seconds.
I have weirdly never had this wild thought until now. because this one is the one. my favourite one. in CAPITALS one. I already read it twice! that’s how much I wish the raven boys by maggie stiefvater was written in gold wires. 😍 what, bookworms biology 101? forgetful creatures that forget that the ‘ that’s the one ’ thought pop up at least 5648 times before. oh.
FIRST ‘ PEOPLE HAVE DIED WAITING SO LONG. WHERE WERE YOU!? ’ OR THE FIRST TIME YOU HAD TO WAIT
which bookworm didn’t wait for what feels like a lifetime before the book they wanted to display on their bookshelf for so long finds its way to their mailbox? incidentally, reading the thing. if the stars align properly or my tbr stops being so greedy guts. it’s more likely the stars align really. but if you have never had to wait you are going to experience paranoid behaviours and agonising fear. like when someone wants to borrow* one of your books! 🙃
* you have to read it, that’s what I said. not have it, charlotte.
I’m still waiting upon the shadow cabinet by maureen johnson if you were wondering. I think I have waited long enough though. the madness underneath left me on a heartbreaking scene, AND THAT WAS 4 YEARS AGO! even if the shadow cabinet was waiting pretty on my bookshelf, so many moons have passed. I remember almost nothing! what I’m a cyborg? that’s irrelevant! I can’t read using my brain. it’s full with worms! know your biology, squid. 😶
SO, WHAT ARE YOUR #MANYFIRST? 😃